Well, the decision has been made. We are going to be a one child family. And I am completely fine and happy with the decision. Dani is amazing but we are happy with just her.
There are many, many, many reasons that went into making this decision. Just a few...
1)I had a horrible labor and c-section, one that I NEVER tell to new mothers because it's cruel and unusual punishment to do so. (well, maybe not but you get the drift) I went through bad postpartum depression and honestly, I don't want to live through any of those ever again.
2)We had a really hard time conceiving Dani. We tried for 5 years and they were years of heartache. We really don't want to go there again. I have a friend going through it now and it just breaks my heart all over again.
3)All my reasons in my "pro" list for having another baby are not because I actually want one. They are fears I have of Dani being an only child and the difficulties that may come to her because of it. Things like loneliness growing up and caring for aging parents alone. However, I've realized there are things we can do to help ease those concerns like making sure she has close relationships with friends and relatives, and taking financial responsibility for our own long term care.
4) Financially, we are just barely making it and we'd have to move to fit another child into our home.
5) I feel I'd be a better mom to Dani if I don't spread myself thinner than I am now. I want to change the world and therefore I try to volunteer my time. I feel either I'd have to stop volunteering and therefore not be the kind of example I want to be for my kids or I wouldn't spend the kind of time with my kids that they need.
6) We don't feel like anything is missing. We are happy and content with Dani.
When I first started contemplating whether we were done or not, I felt weird about my desire to have only one child. As if I was doing it "wrong" or something. I have quit trying to justify my decision and just accept the fact that it's our decision and as long as we both agree, it's just fine. There is no one right way to parent all children. All children are different, all parents are different. And with Dani's personality and my personality I feel being an only child will actually be better for her anyway.
I absolutely adore Dani. She's tied for the best thing that's ever happened to me (with CJ of course) She was absolutely worth the 5 years of heartache and the horrible labor and delivery. So now I'm going to raise her the best way I can.
And that is enough.
Friday, May 7, 2010
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
VACATION!!!!!!!!
Yeah!!!! CJ and I have made plans for our first real vacation in 10 years! The last one being our honeymoon. It's going to be our 10 year anniversary this June and we really wanted to do something. It's been a really tough year money-wise, Murphy has been our constant companion but we've been able to scrape up enough to make this vacation happen. We're going to Wisconsin Dells for 3 days/2 nights and then to Minneapolis, MN to visit our friends Josh and Ashley Vance for 3 days/3 nights. (Can't wait to meet their new baby boy, Elake)
I found a motel on TripAdvisor.com. It's rated #1 in value and customer satisfaction in the Wisconsin Dells area. We got a whirlpool room, with a private balcony over the pool and a king sized bed for $85 a night! Yeah! They also have rooms with multiple rooms and kitchens for about the same price. They have several really nice, new playgrounds and grills that we can use. Plus a heated outdoor pool, an indoor pool and 2 hot tubs. We've decided if we like this place then we'll bring Dani here for our next vacation.
I read all the reviews for this place! At least back till 2007 or so and I only saw 3 bad reviews. All of them had a reply from the owner (it's family owned, has been since it opened) and he basically told them they should have called to let them know of their problems (they keep records of all calls and complaints, there was none for these people) and he would have either fixed it or given the a FULL REFUND! He even offered to give them a refund now. Seriously? I was shocked. There were probably about 5 reviews that gave descriptions of problems they'd had and they were ALL satisfied with how it was fixed, quickly! One person described how their fridge didn't close properly and the manager was there within 5 minutes and when he couldn't repair it, he had a new one brought to them in 15 minutes. That's awesome. All the rooms have been remodeled over the last 3 years and the beds, I've heard, are to die for. They put some big money into all new Sealy beds. Can't wait to sleep on them!
It's definately a motel, not a huge resort like so many of the hotels there in the Dells, but we don't need that. I think every single review said the place was unbelievably clean even before the rooms were remodeled and everything was old. Plus, the rooms are supposed to be really big, even the suites with multiple rooms. All I need is a quiet spot to relax with my hubby. It's on the edge of town so it's not surrounded by noise and traffic but it's just a couple blocks from the downtown area with all the restaurants and shops. It's sounds perfect!
Anyway, I'm just excited, can you tell? I have no idea what I'm going to do without Dani for 6 days but I know she's in good hands. Grandma Lynn and Mimi (my mom) are going to watch her for us. It'll be really good for CJ and I to have this time together. Plus it'll be great to see Josh and Ashley. We saw them in November but that's too long ago. I'm going through Ashley withdrawal. :)
Happy (almost) 10 years Baby!!!
I found a motel on TripAdvisor.com. It's rated #1 in value and customer satisfaction in the Wisconsin Dells area. We got a whirlpool room, with a private balcony over the pool and a king sized bed for $85 a night! Yeah! They also have rooms with multiple rooms and kitchens for about the same price. They have several really nice, new playgrounds and grills that we can use. Plus a heated outdoor pool, an indoor pool and 2 hot tubs. We've decided if we like this place then we'll bring Dani here for our next vacation.
I read all the reviews for this place! At least back till 2007 or so and I only saw 3 bad reviews. All of them had a reply from the owner (it's family owned, has been since it opened) and he basically told them they should have called to let them know of their problems (they keep records of all calls and complaints, there was none for these people) and he would have either fixed it or given the a FULL REFUND! He even offered to give them a refund now. Seriously? I was shocked. There were probably about 5 reviews that gave descriptions of problems they'd had and they were ALL satisfied with how it was fixed, quickly! One person described how their fridge didn't close properly and the manager was there within 5 minutes and when he couldn't repair it, he had a new one brought to them in 15 minutes. That's awesome. All the rooms have been remodeled over the last 3 years and the beds, I've heard, are to die for. They put some big money into all new Sealy beds. Can't wait to sleep on them!
It's definately a motel, not a huge resort like so many of the hotels there in the Dells, but we don't need that. I think every single review said the place was unbelievably clean even before the rooms were remodeled and everything was old. Plus, the rooms are supposed to be really big, even the suites with multiple rooms. All I need is a quiet spot to relax with my hubby. It's on the edge of town so it's not surrounded by noise and traffic but it's just a couple blocks from the downtown area with all the restaurants and shops. It's sounds perfect!
Anyway, I'm just excited, can you tell? I have no idea what I'm going to do without Dani for 6 days but I know she's in good hands. Grandma Lynn and Mimi (my mom) are going to watch her for us. It'll be really good for CJ and I to have this time together. Plus it'll be great to see Josh and Ashley. We saw them in November but that's too long ago. I'm going through Ashley withdrawal. :)
Happy (almost) 10 years Baby!!!
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